写惊蛰的诗不少，但元稹的这首五言诗简洁明快，特色鲜明。名词和动词的结合产生的效果生动形象、展现了惊蛰前后大自然和人间的变化。原诗中用到的名词有气、光、花、鸠、时、芽、事、田等，动词有惊、开、化、争、修、务、满等。英译时把握住名词和动词，就把握住了原诗的要旨。关于韵脚，鉴于文本的长短不一，我以为汉语可以隔行押韵，而英语隔行的押韵的效果就不如每行押韵。因此，译文的韵脚采用了AA,BB,CC,DD的格式。王佐良先生说过，成功的翻译是直译和意译的结合。在尽可能直译的前提下，考虑到达意和韵律，译者添加了一些原文中没有的成分，比如第4行at all hours, 第8行a cheerful mood等。此外，把“生事”译为“clothing and food”，是一种具化的策略。
Many poems about Jingzhe were composed. This five-character poem of Yuan Zhen’s is concise and lively, with distinctive features. The effect of the combination of nouns and verbs is vivid, showing the changes of nature and people’s life before and after Jingzhe. The nouns used in the original poem include qi, light, flower, dove, time, bud, thing and field, etc. The verbs are surprise, open, transform, repair, compete, do and fill. Translating these nouns and verbs effectively would reflect the gist of the original poem. In terms of rhyming, given the length of the text, I believe in Chinese, alternate rhyme is effective, while in English, I’d rather choose couplet rhyme scheme. Therefore, the format of AA, BB, CC, DD is adopted in the translation. Professor Wang Zuoliang suggests that in any successful translation a combination of both literal and free translation strategies could be identified. On the premise of translating literally as much as possible, the translator adds some elements that are not found in the original text, such as “at all hours” in line 4, and “a cheerful mood” in line 8. In addition, translating the general word “Shengshi (issues of living)” into“clothing and food” is a strategy of specification.
换一换
